When Jessica, my oldest daughter, was born 11 years ago, she couldn’t have been born to a worse situation. Her brother, who was 4, had just been diagnosed with Leukemia and life for me was a mad whirlwind. Appointments, and treatments, and day long hospital stays. How in the world could I handle a baby, as a single mother, when I had so much on my plate already??
The odds of being a good mom were stacked against me.The odds of being a great mom…slim to none.
And that’s where the blessing comes in. The blessing? You ask. Yes. The blessing. I gave birth that day to a beautiful 7 lb 3 oz bundle of forgiveness.
My daughter, Jessica, is THE MOST forgiving person I know. Her temperament and personality were exactly what I needed.
I had never really thought of it that way before. But last week, while talking to a friend about “the way” Jessica is (serious, mature, and overly sensitive), she said, “Yes. But she kinda needed to be that way. Just think of how it was in your life when she was born. She has always needed to have a grown-up mentality.”
At first, I was slightly offended. I instantly thought I had robbed her of a good childhood. But then I thought about it for a minute. It was true. She NEEDED to be mature. She NEEDED to be extra compassionate and loving. She NEEDED to be calm and serious. And most important she needed to be patient and forgiving. And she was. She IS. And I love her so much for that.
It truly is a different experience to be a mother of girls versus boys. Here are a few of the things I love most:
photo credit:imagerymajestic via www.freedigitalphotos.net
1.The glitter and glam. I love painting nails and doing hair and picking out cute frilly little dresses for them to wear.2. The pictures. The endless poses and smiles and Diva-esque struts caught on film. The parties where we dressed up and strutted around like models and took pictures.
3. The snuggles. The calm, loving moments where contentment is reached just in holding on to each other.
4. The understanding. The instant understanding of another woman’s mentality. When to back off and give mom space, when to push for what we want and feel we deserve.
5. The emotions. Yes. A strange one given that girls tend to be so emotionally over the top. But the happy times are that much happier and the funny times are that much funnier. And the love is so much more open.
6. The affection. Girls aren’t afraid to give you some love. No fussing and carrying on about hugs and kisses. Just open arms.
7. The fun. The tea parties and fun times playing with Barbies and dolls.
8. The imagination. The make-believe stories and imaginary friends. The endless hours spent playing dress-up.
9. The giggles. The straight from the belly, deep down peels of excitement that bubble out in the form of hysterical giggling.
10. The encouragement. The times that I was feeling down and out, having a daughter to notice that and offer encouragement. And embrace me. And tell ME it was gonna be okay. Priceless.
11. The tears. Another odd reason. But it was in those times of disappointment that I could comfort and hold and offer the encouragement that they have offered me all these years of being their mother.
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*This post was originally written as a birthday tribute to my oldest daughter for her 11th birthday in January 2014.
Love it, so true. And Jessica is the sweetest, good job momma!
ReplyDeleteThanks so much!! She is a sweetheart! <3
DeleteLovely.
ReplyDeleteI am honest, I a little bit jealous of all the pink in your house! I love this post. as I was reading it, I remembered reading it before. when I first started following you and I read every single one of your blog posts in one sitting!! Thank you for sharing you tales and adventures, thoughts and everything else in between! <3
ReplyDeleteLove it, so many wonderful feelings evokes in your beautiful story. As a Mom to boys I thought about my list. The number one reason is how I love how they look after me when I need songs to soothe and wings to fly. 💗
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